Have you ever had a moment where you desire to do something out of love, not duty? You get to a place where your commitment is because of love. You serve because it is a passion. Your thoughts, feelings, and will are all in. You experience yourself becoming a lover. Before, you were a doer. You focused on doing in order to experience love. You fought to be loved. You felt you have fallen short of it. You thought love will continue to evade you. You worked and worked in order to feel, to give, to know, to hear, and to experience love.
But, it was there all along. There for real. There for free. There in full. There in steadfastness. There in perfection. There in purity. Yet, you kept striving to achieve it. You were determined to earn it. So, you thought doing will make you worthy of it. You willed yourself to love, but you got tired. The harder you fought the more tired you became. The more you strove the less love you had. The less you experienced. The less you shared. Truth is that love is not from us. That means no amount of work. That means no level of determination. That means that no pity party. That means no craving for it was sufficient to create love. That means nothing we could do would have brought love. You obeyed out of fear. You obeyed for appearance. You obeyed out of duty. You obeyed, but your heart was not in it. Love was missing. You screwed up many times. You sought to regain love through work after you sinned. You thought you had to earn something given freely. What pride? What misunderstanding? What deceit?
But, in a moment when you have just sinned you got it. Weird, right? Not in a moment of striving. Not in a moment of doing good. Instead in a moment when you have just disobeyed. You want to do the norm. You know, work to get back in a right standing. So, you could say you earn love. Like you always thought. Like you were told. Like you were led to believe. This time it's different. The love you sought to earn has finally captured you. The love you worked to earn has finally captivated you. The love you strove to achieve has coveted you. The love you desire wants to court you. This love covers you. It has been covering you, and will always cover you. It was always jealous for you, and will always be jealous for you. It was patient, and will always be patient. It was kind, and will always be kind. It was steadfast, and will always be steadfast.
Now you are getting it. Now you are seeing it. Now you are believing it. Now you are receiving it. Now you are allowing it to hold you. Now you are trusting in it. Now you are realizing the truth of it. Now you are surrendering to it. Not out of fear. Not out of duty. Not to give an appearance. No! It is for real. What was and is always real is now accepted by you. You are loved! So, you put away striving to earn it. You open your heart, head, and hand to receive more of it. Your emotions, thoughts, and will you submit to it. In each and every moment. You are in that sweet spot. In that secret place. Not just today. But every day. And you don't want to leave. You are contented there. You find rest there. In the bosom of this love. In the safety and shelter of this love. Now, your obedience begins to be out of love. You love to obey. You obey because you love. Even when you fall. Even when you sin. You are grieved by your sins.
But now you trust in this love. You don't run from this love in those moments of sin and pain. You run to it. There is no fear anymore. Because this love is perfect. And it is removing all of your fears. For that is what this love does. You say, for real, I Love You LORD! Why? Because He has loved you first. Now, you can't but respond to His love with love. It becomes refreshing, powerful, and transforming. Thanks God for Your Love! You are Awesome!
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